Love it or not..

I have under the last couple of weeks been thinking of it's okey to love someone or if I shall stop even trying it. I have once been so In love and it was sooo great, I would walk over water for him. But he is dead today, and no that wasn't my fault, but it's still hurts.

I have for a long while talked to a nice guy that I feel alot more then just like a friend. When I was over the sea and meet him I was in heaven or what u can call it. But yeah I miss him, I need him...

I want to go there again. But it would be cool to bring my brother whit me also because he miss his country too, yeah my brother is from uk. I so want him to meet this guy, not that I really need him to aprove him or so but.. yeah maybe I would feel better if he would. He do know this guy from chatting online with him and so, but they have never meet eachother, and yeah call me daft or something, I just want to show him.

It's like I can't let me love him to fully, but I can't think of anything else. I have not been a nun or something and always been waaay to free typing in chats etc *giggles* but the last 2 weeks I don't feel its fun anymore. I don't want it or need it.

I have been talking to my brother alot about this and I just love him for beeing there for me when I needed it. It's not that I have to many friends I can talk about how I really feel for other ppl. So bro: Thx for beeing there for me *bows*